Im Ted Burtmen reporting live outside fa-coo-ji beach where Lauren has just been spotted pouring a massive amount of orange kool aid into the water. Law enforcement and local beach activist are en route. We have one witness who said he saw the entire incident unfold...tell us sir, what did you witness..'well I was just standing there, minding my own sand castle when she comes right over and then starts dumping kool aid into the water, I thought it was a joke, until I realized..wait..somethings wrong here'
Wait...were just getting word of a reported statement by Lauren...when asked what was the meaning of this she replied 'I'm bringing color to the wa wa water' We have unconfirmed reports that Lauren plans to make an escape to the depths of the sea and seek asylum with mermaids and sea creatures.
Many of you might remember Lauren from her most recent mishap with the state senate and her cookie catastrophe. This is Ted Burtmen, we'll keep you posted.
